By Yamila García

If we notice that something in us differs from how it is for others, we tend to analyze it. Among many other things, my memory is one of the different characteristics that I possess in relation to others. I remember vivid images of certain details that I observed or experienced many years ago. My tendency to focus on details rather than the big picture makes my memories more about details. I remember smells, flavors, and textures very clearly. Also, I remember things from a long time ago more than many people. For example, I remember my grandfather entering his house after work, with his blue and gray bag. The interesting thing about this is that at that time, I was more or less 18 months old. So, anyone could say that I have a good memory. My short-term memory doesn’t work the same way. I usually don’t remember things I did or was told the day before or even a few hours ago. I know this may sound like a problem but I actually have some control over this. 

Sometimes, I decide to erase those memories. Sometimes life feels too overwhelming, and I feel like as soon as I solve something, I leave it behind completely to reduce the burden. I try to clear out of my way everything that I should not worry about anymore. It’s as if I reset that space in my internal memory. And I know I’m in control because I do retain other short-term memories. Of incomplete things that I have to do. I just choose what to keep and what to let go. This way, I feel I have more “space” for the things I have to deal with. Maybe this comes because of my way of working. I don’t work well when I have to focus on many things at once. However, I can focus on one thing at a time and only that way I can do a good job. If I were given two assignments at the time, I can’t do a little bit of one and then start the other one. Instead, I start one, I finish it, and then I can move to the other one, leaving behind and erasing the first one. I always realized how different this is from how most people work. That’s the reason I started questioning my way. However, I think I like it as it is; I don’t feel I wouldn’t change it. It feels efficient and it’s been my way for as long as I can remember.

By Yamila García

For some reason, I stopped doing one of the things I love the most: swimming. Just thinking about it makes me feel relaxed. The serenity of the movement of the water, the peaceful blue color, the chlorine smell, and just looking at the black line at the bottom of the pool give me more peace than anything in this world. Everything feels soft, not too hot or too cold, calm, and quiet. It’s almost as if I were immersed in an ideal world for a neurodivergent, a world without so many stimuli to overwhelm me. That’s my idea of how neurotypicals must feel the world around them. Maybe I’m wrong, or not. I don’t know; I just know that turning off those stimuli for a while feels like a simple life, one where I can have a clean and calm mind. While I swim, my ideas do not overlap; they are ordered. I can think clearly, and my thoughts are free of anxiety. I can also let my thoughts go and focus on what I feel, the silence, and the few things I see at the bottom of the pool. 

It’s not just about what I feel while I swim, but the subsequent effect it has on me. After swimming, I feel like a big weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I feel happy, and positive, wanting to do more things for myself. Exercising is a great tool to take care of our physical health, as we already know, but it is also one of the most powerful tools to take care of our mental health. Moving at least a few minutes a day, whether going for a walk, doing a sport that we like, or dancing if you are more expressive and artistic, can have an almost instantaneous impact on how we feel. I am happy to have returned to doing what I like so much, and it makes me feel so good that I wish everyone could find an activity that does them good too. I’m sure that way we would all have a little more peace and happiness. I know sometimes it’s hard to go out when we don’t feel well, but that’s when we need it most. Energy is not stable, so if at any time you feel the slightest urge to move, go out and do something for yourself. Don’t think about it. Put on your sneakers and go out! Move for your mental health! Those little moments led me to buy myself a swimsuit, look for my goggles, and finally get back into the pool.

By Yamila García

I have never stopped to think about how important it was to have friends to help me overcome so many things, even without knowing that I was neurodivergent. In my country, friends are like family. Seriously. It’s not just a saying. I knew all the members of my friends’ families, and they knew mine. We attended various events together with our families, and our relatives were acquainted with each other. In my country, your friends are part of your day-to-day life; they know what you’re up to, inquire about your mother, ask when you had a doctor’s appointment, or if you’ve seen another group of friends. In some way, we all feel a little responsible for our friends’ wellbeing. We message each other almost every day. You see your friends at least once a week, share delicious food, express everything you need to say, and continue the round with the others. If a friend is going through a difficult time, we try to accompany them more; almost by inertia, we contact them more often, discussing updates about the affected person, planning more meetings than usual, and trying to engage in their hobbies or support them in some other way.

Looking back, I realize how much my friends supported me and how many times they saved me. I recently watched a documentary that mentioned how having a support group can reduce the chances of getting sick or becoming depressed. I believe everyone could benefit from having a group of people to share life with and laugh with periodically. It’s not that in my country we have plenty of time or that no one works; it’s just that no one there contemplates life without friends. Even with busy schedules, work, and exhaustion, we make time for our friends because we know it is therapeutic. I know my friends made it possible for me to overcome many things, including the idea of “having friends,” even though it might sound redundant. It’s easy there; if you don’t talk, someone will surely talk to you.

Therefore, with my experience benefiting from this way of living, I want this post to serve as motivation to contact that friend you haven’t heard from in a long time, to continue cultivating ties, and to stay as close to people as possible. We live in a society, and as challenging as it is for many to feel like we fit in, it’s even more difficult while being isolated. Having a community or support group is often overlooked when thinking about people’s wellbeing and health; however, for me, it should be at the top of the list.